I recently received a heartfelt message from a dear old friend who has just been diagnosed with breast cancer. She reached out seeking advice on coping with the stress that comes with the diagnosis.
Understanding my friend's fear and anxiety, I called her right away. We talked a lot about her diagnosis and how she was feeling about starting chemo. I shared some tips based on my own experiences with chemo.
Even though she first got in touch to talk about dealing with the stress from her diagnosis, we didn't actually get into that much during our conversation. But we agreed to talk again soon, and I'm sure we'll focus on that more then.
In the meantime, I felt compelled to write a blog post on the subject.
In October 2016, I was diagnosed with-
Grade 3
Stage 111C
Estrogen-Positive
HER 2-Negative-
Invasive Ductal-Carcinoma
I received chemo first, then a mastectomy, followed by radiation treatments.
I'm not going to lie; it was tough at times, especially chemo.
Oddly enough, the mastectomy wasn't as bad as I had expected.
Radiation wasn't too bad, other than some burns and blisters I experienced at one point. Postponing treatments for a week and using some cream the doctor gave me took care of those pretty quickly.
In November 2020, after a scan revealed a spot on a lymph node that hadn't been seen before, I was sent for a biopsy. The biopsy came back positive for cancer. When my doctor said that with this recurrence, my cancer was no longer curable, I was hit with a flood of questions. What did that mean? Was it metastatic breast cancer? Stage 4? Was it terminal?
After the initial shock, I found the courage to ask the questions that were on my mind. I was reassured to learn that while there's still no cure for metastatic breast cancer, it's now highly treatable. Thanks to advances in treatments, it's no longer the dire diagnosis it once was. Instead, it's viewed as a chronic condition, and people are living longer, with a better quality of life.
After leaving the doctor's office, a nurse gave me a card for a "Cancer Training Class?!" I mumbled under my breath, "Thanks, but this ain't my first pink rodeo." I'm not sure if she heard my comment or if she read the look on my face, but she then explained that with a recurrence, the treatments can be different, and the stress level might increase. That's why they offer the class to patients who have received a cancer diagnosis, whether it's your first time or not.
On a side note, the phrase "This Ain't My First Pink Rodeo" kept coming to mind over the next few weeks. Eventually, I decided to use it as the name for this blog.
DEALING WITH THE STRESS THAT COMES WITH THE DIAGNOSIS
BLOGGING HELPS
I've found that sharing my experience with breast cancer through writing really helps me sort through my thoughts and feelings. I never thought of myself as a writer, but I hope that blogging isn't just therapeutic for me but also helpful for others dealing with similar challenges.
FAITH
I have tried different methods to manage stress over the past few years. Some have been helpful, while others not so much. However, when it comes to dealing with the stress of my diagnosis, I cannot emphasize enough how much my faith has helped me through this journey.
I understand that not everyone reading this shares my beliefs, and I respect that. I've never been the type of person to push my faith on others. However, the person who asked me to share my story shares my Christian faith, so I feel compelled to discuss how much my faith means to me and how it's been such a source of comfort during tough times.
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FAITH OVER FEAR
In 2016, when I first received my diagnosis, I was overwhelmed by fear. When I expressed some of those fears to a friend, she quickly replied that I should not allow my fear to be bigger than my faith.
We've all encountered the saying "Faith Over Fear" on social media, on T-shirts, devotionals, and other such items. So, it seems pretty simple, right?
Many people seem to have faith easily in every situation, but for me, it hasn't been that simple. I often wake up feeling fearful and doubtful, with no sense of choice. My heart is anxious from the moment I open my eyes.
Yes, I'm human, and I sometimes let fear take over without consciously deciding to. But I'm working on choosing faith instead of fear and anxiety. It's not always easy, but over time, it has definitely gotten easier for me.
I believe it's important to plan for the future and set goals but not to spend too much energy worrying about it.
HOW TO LET FAITH BE BIGGER THAN FEAR
For me, having faith and letting that faith be bigger than my fear means trusting in God and not letting fear control my life. But does this mean I shouldn't listen to medical professionals?
Absolutely not! I am firm in my belief that God created us as intelligent beings and bestowed upon us the ability to develop medicines to help heal our bodies. Doctors are a gift from God, playing a critical role in bringing about healing and recovery.
I've had some intense discussions with people about issues like COVID-19 vaccines and my cancer treatments. It's frustrating when someone insists that trusting medical professionals and scientists means I don't trust in God. Seriously? In my view, God has given us intelligence and common sense, and He expects us to use them, especially when it comes to our health.
I trust my team of doctors and nurses completely and faithfully follow their treatment plans. However, when it comes to making tough life decisions, I turn to God for guidance because my ultimate faith lies in Him.
I really believe it's crucial to have a solid plan for medical treatment when fighting cancer. But for me, having a spiritual treatment plan is just as important. It really helps me stay hopeful and strong and keeps my faith stronger than my fear.
MY SPIRITUAL CARE PLAN
- Praying
- Daily devotionals
- Journaling or blogging
- Reading Scripture
- Sharing my feelings with trusted loved ones, venting, crying
- I advised my friend to check out some of my old blog posts on this topic and to feel free to reach out to me anytime she needs to chat, vent, scream, or pray!
- PLEASE REMEMBER-
- If you have been diagnosed with cancer, it's important to remember that there is no right or wrong way to deal with it. Regardless of your beliefs, who or what you put your faith in, or where you are on your journey, be kind to yourself. Cancer is just a part of your life – don't let it become the most important part!
- Blessings,
- Pam
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